My husband seems to find it easier to reach by masturbation rather than me helping him--even orally...?

He says he knows exactly what and when and how to do what feels best. I've even told him it would be okay with me for him to guide me either by telling me or showing me what feels good to him. He thinks that makes things too awkward. I'm left feeling very sad and inadequate, with a huge hit to my ego. Any suggestions. Only serious replies please.